Sometime back I used to wonder why some people in life give consideration and more-so-over their derrieres for their friends and stuff like that. I used to also tell myself that being selfish and keeping calm about it could be the way to move on through life. You need not ever think about someone so much so as to alter your life until and unless you feel he/she deserves so. Also whenever you feel the urge or need of someone even if it’s just a handful of people you should know where to go to, who to approach what to do. And there it was the biggest flaw in the plan. You can never expect someone, not even your close ones (With the exception of your family of course) to lay down the lights for you. I tried it; and trust me it failed miserably. I was catapulted into this personality of someone who wanted to be alone with just a few people whom he considered “the special ones”. It was not a bad thing to do perhaps but it harmed me in ways I could not imagine. Some of my very close friends saw it, and they did try to bring me back but the problem was “I was very very happy” to the extent that I would smile all day long get into conversations with people but be all superficial and careful. and they frankly could not do anything about it because I was happy. I also used to think about one special person (She-who-must-not-be-named) ALL THE TIME. I was away from her because I decided to, I was looking out for her because I wanted to. She never expressed, I never said, whenever we met it was amazing. But it was a sad life. YES. IT WAS A VERY VERY SAD LIFE. You would never want to live a life like that. Probably you have, or are, I do not know. But you would regret your decision later. I am not the person who should say this probably advise you over all this stuff. But it’s true. It is there and that is the ugly truth. BELIEVE IT.
Somewhere I came across this collection of things-not-to-do-in-your-20s and when I read them I realized half of them I was already doing and some were waiting to happen if I had not been pushed out of my situation. I thought I was acting mature I was being really good with settling my life but NO I was actually being a fool to think I could control something which has always controlled me. Something which controls you. Your Destiny. I think I sound weird when I say “You have no control over your life”. OK. On a Sunday just play your favorite song sit back relax your mind and question it. What have you done off your own accord till date ? How much of it have you achieved ? What gives you the confidence to say that you have control ? Once you get all these answers you know what I’m talking about.
If you are reading this with a bit of seriousness you’ll know what I’m pointing out to. And I’m addressing all the working youngsters who have just started earning a life for themselves. (That is the only crowd I have the right to address to). Coming back to my personality which was all flawed and what I initially told you about. You must have seen the flaw the way I described it. It was my own decisions. I thought I had my life set and I needed nothing more. Also I thought nothing could be better than whatever I have. And I need no one to advise me do the same. When things slip you realize what you held was not plenty neither was it less than what you deserve. I learned it the hard way and I hope you should not. Here are a few little things you just need to make sure to give yourself a direction. I would add it as a disclaimer this might be incorrect, maybe your life is a fairy tale. Don’t blame me if I ruined it. But we all know this is something which happens in a parallel universe. So here it is :
- If you work with something you love never try to leave it. Never in your life stop doing what you like. It could be the smallest thing from eating an eclair to a bigger thing like teaching a child. But if you love it…as Nike rightly says “JUST DO IT !!!” You will never regret it.
- Never take your decisions which involves how your later half of life is going to turn out without your parents. Always listen to them. Always tell them. Scary as it may seem with their reactions but no one in this world can love you more.
- Always be the man of the moment do not hold yourself back from living. Do not ever think that someone thinks this is not good for me so I should not do it. Do it. Experience it. And then decide.
- Friendship is important but don’t keep hankering for it around someone. “Never trust but always listen” is a rule for many. But “Always listen, think and then do it” is something most people forget. All in all I mean “Blind faith is Bad faith. Having faith decides your fate”. Again, listen to your family they never mean ill.
- Never fall in love before you know you have lifted your life from the ordinary-regular-guy-thing. Love is good, it’s brilliant. It adds color but it also narrows down your vision. You look towards a distant future not even in existence. Your decisions are hampered. All I say here is that you should never have this thought in your mind that “I held back on something because of the love I had for someone. Had I done it today I would be a happy man.”
- Never blame anyone for what happens in your life. Know thyself. Do your deeds. Blame it on your actions. This judgement is never wrong because only you have the power to set it right because you started with it in the first place.
- Trust your own actions rather than others’ words. It leaves the onus of it on yourself.
- Never pretend anything in any place, you will end up as a tool. If you want some quality in you. try to search for it within. Our mind is full of possibilities, You just might surprise yourself.
- Make your WANTs you NEEDs. It’s never a bad thing to think about owning the best watch the best phone. But only thinking about it will not help. To make it something that you need you need to work towards it and never look back.
- Fail to succeed in everything you do. Until and unless you know the flip side of the coin you’ll never value it. It kind of sums up everything I said here.
I am not a preacher neither do I expect anyone to listen to me and follow. But if you have read it this far just remember these words “Little Things, Give You Away…”